Energy you attract… it’s a part of you

The law of attraction is pretty ridiculous. It’s true, of course. However, it seems to be the most difficult universal law for many to truly understand. When faced with any situation in which you are dealing with a person that perhaps irks you, look inside yourself. There is often an undeniable similarity somewhere in the way that person is behaving to an attribute of yourself that you are perhaps unconsciously portraying. Now, I don’t mean that someone who finds themselves on the other end of a violent relationship is necessarily violent themselves, but what they are doing is putting out a specific frequency. That frequency may be one of the victim, the wounded child, the repressed feminine, the femme fatale, or the Debbie Downer. These fragmented aspects of ourselves can be great teachers if we allow them to be. Left to run amuck, these personifications can be detrimental not only to ourselves, but to everyone around us. And the more we identify with these aspects, the more we attract circumstances which make these the most appropriate We all have met these people inside of ourselves at one time or another, but if serious healing is needed and we neglect to take notice of the lessons the universe is presenting to us in what now becoming a much faster, louder and indisputable experience, sometimes a little outside intervention is helpful and even necessary.

Pride is a bitch. It is a frequency, a state of consciousness that is still very much grounded in force. It will never conquer or serve any of us to our highest potential, and by definition of force, there will always be opposition. It can be difficult to accept outside intervention at times, but in the end, people who have wrapped themselves in so much chaos that have made outside intervention necessary, are here again to teach us great lessons: Consistency, Trust and Unconditional Love. These are  the elements that were missing at some point during their early development. And these are often the elements that we as a whole continue to miss still.

About a month ago, I had a very enlightening evening with my partner and a friend in which I experienced new levels of consciousness that are challenging to put into words. I aligned my will with divine will and fully allowed myself to be a servant to all, whoever shall need me, in whatever way I can best serve for the highest good of the whole. I find that the law of attraction has new meaning for me. For when incidents arise that a particular person iks me, I can very quickly take the lesson and be grateful for the gentle (or sometimes not so gentle) reminder that I may still need to do some inner work around a particular subject or event. I’ve also noticed that events or people that come into play are not necessarily attracted by a similar frequency in me, but a frequency within a group of people and I am here to help stabilize and return the group to harmony. No one is ever perfect and with all the lies and misinformation we have all learned growing up, it’s amazing that we still have that spark inside us that still searches for something bigger.

So what happens when you run into a situation or a person that represents an unhealed frequency of the whole? You respond as a whole. It brings you together to talk about and release your experiences in order to put the focus and healing where it needs to go. You fulfill and honor the lesson. Unless as a group your make that conscious decision to transcend that level of consciousness together, a few pieces will and then another few pieces will and then some will fall away. This is what we are dealing with on a universal scale. Our world. Our universe. We have all been (although to many unknowingly) creating our own little universes that this Earth has furnished the makings for. Sure, those who know the rules have played the game better than some, but no matter what we have greater ability in numbers. If we align our intentions together, a new world shall be born.

Aside from the declaration of alignment I acted upon last month, I also made a bond and agreement with several friends to act entirely as a community or very large family. We pretty much already did this, but it was never officially declared and for the most part work and money was always a private aspect. Now, we eat as a family whenever it best suits the family, money is earned for the family, every trade and skill is a gift to be leaned, shared and appreciated by all. Since this happened, I have been able to turn off the heat in my house for a tree guy now brings us old dead wood to feed our fire endlessly, a sweatlodge for community use and led by an Lakota-Souix elder with no where else to sweat (and had been looking for a lodge space for almost a year) has been built in my back yard and I am now learning to pour and lead a sweat ceremony, a surprising amount of prospective family members have emerged with amazing talents and gifts. Abundance is endless.

After years of my own healing, I’ve finally come to really love the law of sttraction. I know because of the frequency in which I hold my home and the vibration I maintain for myself, I can create a higher potential experience for an entire family. I have enough weight to lend a few pounds so to speak. We all do. It’s time for us to realize our full potential and finally understand how this universe really works. After all, the answers have been so plainly in front of us all along. We just forgot to pay attention.

Forgive and Forget Being Right

We are transcending our need to be right. As we continue our evolution, the need to be right seems about as necessary as the need for a giant billboard advertisement in the middle of the jungle. It’s not that necessary. Being right, although it may feel like a thai massage on the ego, reinforces duality. You are claiming your separateness with pride and rigidity. You are stating YOU are WRONG and I am RIGHT. Me= this, You= that and we are different. My separateness is better and yours, is of lesser quality and the universe desires you less because of it. So there. Stick tongue out, thumbs in ears and big wavy jazzy-moose hands out… neener neener.┬áThat’s what being right feels like.

But I KNOW I was right. Yeah, sure you do. You know that your intentions were right or that you really did study that thing in college and totally know what you’re talking about, but what’s being focused on is the ego. It is self-serving.

Moving forward beyond the need to be right is part of our ascension. Moments of friction or disharmony are obstacles we create to teach us this lesson.

The need to be right is grounded is force, not true power. Force is always met with opposition and duality. It removes us from source and is not supportive of life. As our vibrational frequency rises and we transcend the need to be right, power is restored and more universal life energy returns to us. We no longer need to be right, we accept what is for what is and our need to self-serve is replaced with our natural tendency to serve others.

You do not need to agree with whatever is given to you, but you can be accepting and choose to only offer love. When we act on the need to be right, we place limitations on love and in turn limitations on ourselves. You will find when you relieve yourself of the burden to be right, you will discover more freedom. The more you practice this, the lighter you will become. The lighter we become, the further along our evolutionary path we wander and inevitably influence and reinforce this action in others.

Try it out. I learned a powerful lesson in acceptance and forgiveness this weekend. After reflecting on the incident I realized that even though I firmly felt I was right… I was placing limitations on myself by agreeing with my ego that I NEEDED to be right. It really didn’t matter. What mattered was the relationship and the person I was in conflict with. I realized this incident occurred because I had not ingrained this lesson into my subconscious. It takes time. The more we make conscious choices to act for the greatest good instead of personal fulfillment, the patterns in our energy field are reinforced so that this becomes our “default” behavior.

Time is speeding up. Our karmic cycles are moving faster and faster and whatever we are sending out is returning to us in rapid pace. When you find yourself in conflict or disharmony, think back a few days. You may be thinking you don’t deserve what is happening, but ask yourself if there was a time in which you acted in self-service or without integrity. Perhaps there is a lesson in the conflict. We are creators of our own reality and all that we experience outside of ourselves in in direct relation to our intentions and feelings within. Forgiving another person or situation will begin the path of forgiving ourselves, embracing qualities within ourselves that we have rejected and bringing us closer to source.

I hope the next time you find yourself in a situation where the need to be right is tugging on your braids and you recall this post. Take a pause and choose love instead. Value the relationship over the argument and let it go.

My mother lives in the ocean

I was 12 when my mom died of cancer. She was diagnosed with terminal breast cancer when I was 5 years old. She was 23, newly re-married and expecting what would have been my first little brother or sister. I remember her visiting me at my grandparents’ house where I lived most of the time with my dad, sitting me down on the bed and saying, “Mommy has cancer. Do you know what cancer is?”

I nodded and said, “But Mommy, people die when they get cancer.”

That’s all I remember.

My life became a series of unfortunate events. Now, I want to add to this by saying that this story is not meant to be a sad one. I believe my mother’s death was what I chose for my life when I entered into this physical plane. Her story is what has inspired me to help others and I hope in sharing this, it brings others some hope or inspiration as well.

My mother’s cancer spread quickly. She had to have an abortion, a hysterectomy, and a mastectomy all in one week. Now remember, she was 23.

I watched my once vibrant, healthy mother deteriorate. I have almost no memories of her healthy. Her original prognosis was 6 months and lived an additional 6 years. From this point on I was taken out of school almost on a monthly basis and rushed to whichever hospital she was at being prepared for her death. My childhood was spent waiting and being prepared for death at any moment. I became very familiar with Swedish hospital and spent many afternoons there finishing my schoolwork while my mother rest in her bed. Sometimes she could play and communicate, sometimes not so much.

I remember one day she asked me for a hug. As I bent towards the bed and tried to hug her frail frame, she burst out crying. “Why won’t you hug me?” She cried. I was afraid of breaking her.

My mother was a fierce fighter.

When she died, we scattered her ashes in the ocean at Cannon Beach, OR. It was ten years before I made it back for a visit. I took a road trip with a girlfriend and made a basket full of origami cranes to place in the water. We used to make origami together during the days when she was well enough to be home. When we scattered her ashes, we placed a crane in the water from each one of the attendees of her party. (My mom had a end of life party complete with a jukebox that played only KC and the Sunshine band and a ton of wine drinking dancing ladies).

Setting foot on the beach again was weird. I thought I would feel more than I did, but instead it felt just like any other time on the beach. No intense emotional rush, just a cloudy day in Oregon.

I walked for a bit and then decided I would just walk to the water and throw in my cranes. (I did make these all out of recycled bio-degradable paper). I walked out a few feet, about calf deep in water, turned around a bit, took a deep breath and said, “Hi mom.”

I saw my girlfriend across the beach running and waving her arms at me wildly. I couldn’t hear her, but as I took another look around me I realized that I was about to be swallowed up by a huge rogue wave! It came crashing down over my head and as I ran for shore, I tossed up my cranes and a few flowers I had picked and I realized tears were rolling down my cheeks and I was laughing. I started to jump and spin around laughing and crying, my entire body drenched with water.

That was the biggest hug I have ever gotten in my life!

My girlfriend and I spent the next few hours drinking wine, frolicking in the water and telling funny stories. It was beautiful.

I visited the Virgin Islands about two years ago and I realized that my mom is in every body of water. All the oceans are connected and as we stepped out on Cinnamon Beach at St. Johns, I was excited to frolic in the water and play with my mom. I splashed about and laughed and had a great time.

A girl about my age that was in our group saw me talking and laughing out in the water by myself. She turned to my partner and said, “well she’s certainly having a grand time out there all by herself.” That’s when he shared my story with her.

As it turned out, her mother had just passed. Her mother’s wish was to be cremated and scattered in the ocean. Her daughter was holding up the wish because she was saddened by the idea that there would be no grave or place for her to visit to see her once her ashes were spread. My story changed her mind and after her visit to the island was over, she was going to go back to her family and let them know they could proceed. A beautiful moment in synchronicity.

Today, because I can’t just hop out and visit the ocean anytime, I’m writing this to say hello again and remember.